After several months of investigation, we can confirm it's time to Doki Doki Panic! Startling evidence suggests that Super Mario Bros.2 for the NES is nothing but disgusting plagiarism.
Warning: if you're prone to seizures, please don't go chasing waterfalls.
Era Error was first alerted to the revelation during an evening of pulling cones at our office, where we tried to trigger an epileptic fit on our intern via the flickering waterfalls in Super Mario Bros. 2. Later into the session, we unanimously wondered why the game was so drastically different to other titles in the series.
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| source: 1jps.tumblr.com/ |
After digging through the deep troves of the internet for many months desperately searching for an answer, we eventually found a strange Japanese Famicom ROM titled 'Doki Doki Panic!'. Our minds were blown.
The similarities are uncanny. Super Mario Bros. 2 is just a sprite swap of a previous game made by Nintendo. Stop the god damn presses!
Completely outraged over such a trivial discovery, we reached out to Nintendo Designer Kensuke Tanabe to raise hell. For some reason he actually decided to reply.
"Dear Era Error,"
"Oh no, you finally figured out Nintendo's greatest shame. Absolutely no-one else on the planet had already uncovered the secret of Super Mario 2's history before you. Not the millions of god awful, cringey gaming Youtubers. Not the brain-dead mainstream press. Not IGN. Not even a 6 year old google searching on the internet. No one."
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| "No one else noticed the literal Japanese Box Art similarities either." |
"We're going to presume that you and your co-workers all have some sort of learning disability, so I'll keep the reasoning why short and sweet. We got lazy and knew you round-eyed arseholes in the west wouldn't notice."
"Can you please keep this revelation a secret?"
"Yours not sincerely you dumb fucks,
Kansuke Tanabe - Nintendo Japan"
No, up yours Nintendo. We're telling the world man!
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| Source: tcrf.net/ |
Sorry to ruin everyone's perception of video game history, but these dirty secrets need to be revealed for the good of the planet. Next thing you know the whole plot of the game will wind up being some shit dream while Mario's asleep or something.
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